The Germany Experience (Munich, Bavaria)

• If you don't know what's happening drink some beer.
  
  
• If you're bored drink some more beer.
  
  
• If you're still bored there's Jagermeister and Vodka !
  
  
• No matter how bored you are DO NOT mix cheap Wine & Korn (looks like vodka but taste WAY WORST) [Listen Learned]
  
  
• In Germany you take White Tequila with salt and lemon like everyone BUT you take Gold Tequila with Orange and Cinnamon [they are weird,. I know]
  
  
• If you're lost ask someone in the street, everyone is somehow super nice and they will help you. They might even walk you half way to your destination if they can. Don't worry if you don't speak German almost everyone speak English, maybe ask young adults to be sure.
  
  
• Try every as many different kind of beer as you can, I mean you're in Germany you should know your shizz. [My advice, Wiessbier or Altbowler, both sweet beers. YUMMY]

• If you're a gay hag like me and go for a Queer night out. Even if you don't know anyone, gays are cray in a good way you'll have a great time. And some tipsy gay just may buy you a drink ! [If in Munich, Queer Sunday at Cafe am Haus is the way] ;)

• In almost every country I've been to you must (for some reason) hide your alcohol in bags, fruit bottles or just drink inside. No in Germany drinking beer (or something else) in the middle of the day in the park is absolutely normal. Don't be surprised if you see an old couple sitting in the bench next to the shops with a 6packs next to them. It's Germany, [Go beer or go home!]
  
  
• And yes I know it's a stereotype to think that because you're in Germany there will be beer everywhere, but there really is. If you want beer you can buy it in the most unexpected places. The Internet Cafe sells beer. The cell shop sells beer. The night time pizzeria sells beer. I mean all we need now is for stupid Mc Donalds to sell beer too ! [go beer or go home!] :)
  
  
• If there is four things that Germans love (still talking about the typical stereotype of Germans here) is Biking, Beer, Wurst (sausages) & Bread (or Pretzel ).
  
  
• But really biking is like a passion for the Germans. They bike everywhere and all the time, no matter the weather. And I quote “It is so much fun to bike when it snows” says a German girl. Some cities don't have underground stations so all they do is BIKE all the time. And yes there is even some cities that have more bikes than people in it (e.g. Munster)
  
  
• Talking about underground stations. They are very practical, and yes it is totally an excuse to get lost in the city. Try this, jump in the underground get out at a random station and just walk all day discover the city. Who cares if you look like a retarded tourist with your confused face and your possible map. Be adventurous. Just make sure you know the name of your underground stop by heart. Btw in Germany they are called “U.Bahn & S.bahn”
  
  
• Beside all i've said German people are really very serious people (I know serious people that loves beer). They are serious and they are (almost always in a hurry). When in the “U.Bahn”, “S.Bahn”, bus or tram, when you see the Germans standing up ready to go out don't stand up too. It just means that the next stop is 5mins away but life is too serious to wait for the door to open while sitting. (big generalisation here)
  
  
• If you have met Germans outside Germany (exchange, on holidays, or just abroad) you must wonder “What Germans serious? No ways”. Well yes they are. But apparently they are only robots in Germany and once they go abroad on holidays they become the crazy Germans we all enjoy so much. (big generalisation here again)
  
  
• Because in Germany all your time must be used wisely, here is a little drinking game i've learned there that allow you to work out (running) and drink beer at the same time.
  So it's simple make two teams, each person in the team has a can of beer (it's always easier with a can of beer). The two teams stand one in front of the other, and standing between them in the middle is a empty bottle (for example). And each person must throw a ball (or a onion if you don't have a ball) and make the bottle fall. When the bottle falls everyone in the team of the person who threw the ball must start downing their beer. The first team that has all players with empty cans wins.
  See in normal drinking games the point is to make the other one drink, in Germany it's the other way around. The winner gets drunk first. :)
  
  
• Germany is not very famous for its nice weather well because it's weather sucks. It's as stable as a pregnant woman-menopausal-PMS all together (yes like that, well in Bavaria it was).
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  So obviously a Sunny day is like a miracle for them. Our dear deutsch are used to Cold and try or Cold and rain. The sun is a gift and when it is there you must enjoy it to the MAX. Go strawberry picking, biking, walking, lay on the sun, perve on hotties, swim EVEYTHING! :)
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• When it's football season some song will be sang. Songs you won't understand. In that case just smile, clap your hands and remember to scream at the end DEUUUUTSSCHLAAAND ! You'll fit right in with the other crazies. Ofc don't forget to hold you glass of beer high while screaming no matter how heavy it is.
  
  
• Yes heavy glass of beer. See in the normal world a big glass of beer is 0,5L well no in Germany that's a normal. A big glass is 1L. And yes that shizz is heavy but even German women carry it like it's nothing. Some people even carry 4 at the same time, but well don't try it.
  
  
• If it's football season and you are agoraphobic, avoid every restaurant/bar with a Tv, avoid public transportation actually just stay at home. If you have to take any kind of public transportation stay on the surface (bus, tram) because from my experience the underground “U.Bahn” gets very VERY full. And maybe you may find yourself in the same underground car as a group of young adult proudly wearing the colour of their team, singing and screaming some German gibberish, and yes some of them just might be drunk. In Munich the street Leopoldstrass/Marienplatz is the worst (is you are agoraphobic) or the best thing that is happening during football season. Either way Football & Beer, YEAH ! Once again if you don't know what to do, clap and scream DEUTSCHLAND! :)
  
  
• So Yeah I said that German peeps are very serious people. But they are also very “Free Spirited” (even in the so called “Christian Conservative” side where I was living >> Bavaria). For example in the early hours of the 23rds of June a few thousands of people stood nude in one in the street for the love of Art. When I say nude I mean nothing but some body paint on. People of all age, gender, size (I even spotted a pregnant woman in the crowd) and it was absolutely amazing.
  
  
• A little History break here, did you know that Hitler started his little group of crazies in Bavaria? And it is also there that is situated Dachau Concentration Camp which was the first concentration camp of Germany and also the only one that was open from the very beginning until the very end. Not such a great part of history but it is always good to know. [History Nerd]
  
  
• If you go to Germany (especially if you are currently living in an African country like me) people will make an enormous amount of jokes about how Germans are racist and will kill you nazis blah blah blah. But beside that very dark part in their History the people I have met in Germany are quite cool (some more than others). And I even talked to old people in the street (one of the many many times I got lost) and even in the “Christian Conservative” side of Germany they were all extremely nice. And I don't know if I am lucky or completely blind and stupid, but as far as I am concern I met ZERO racists.
  
  
• In Munich there is actually so many international people that if you wanted to be racist you should just move out of the city before having a panic attack. Funny enough during my two months in Germany I must have met a good 8 Germans. I somehow always ended up sitting next to/talking with international people, USA, Netherlands, Italy, Columbia, China, even countries like Uzbekistan, Vietnam and Albania. But Germans were the hardest to find.
  
  
• Someone would wonder “Why would someone in their right mind learn German?” Well I asked this question to myself so many times. I must have taken the decisions in a moment of insanity, but I regret nothing because once you get passed the fear of words with 12 letters it is actually a nice language. Plus according to statistics (I swear I read it somwhere) Germany is one of the country where most people from Europe would like live. :)
  
  
• And if you still have doubt about Germany think about BEER FESTIVALS ! Yes festivalS. Especially “Oktober Fest” which is basically the biggest craziest beer festival of all. Fun Fact abt the “Oktober Fest” is happens in mostly in September, yeah Germans are weird like that, don't ask. Actually do. You want to hear drunk people tell you stories, it is always fun. :)
  
  
• If you've been anywhere else in Germany they will tell you that people from Bavaria are weird. But weird is always good. Plus I would have to say from personal experience, there is something very “homy” about Munich. It's not really a city, but not really a village either and that makes it feel so cosy and nice. Once you're use to it you don't really want to go.
  
  
• One last thing, DEUTSCHLAND ! *raise glass of beer high and proud* :)